-Psalm 73:26
It's 2:38 in the morning and I'm going to be mad at myself at 6:30 when I have to get up for class but I have so much on my chest tonight. I don't know what is wrong with me lately, my title fits perfect, I'm struggling to make it real. My life, my faith, all that I feel. I'm down here at Tennessee away from everyone and God is stretching me, breaking me, molding me, and making me. It's tough. I have so many things going through my head and I don't know how to even begin to put them into sentences. I know one thing though, Psalm 73:26 is my lifesaving verse right now and I'm holding onto nothing other than my Heavenly Father up above. So much is changing in my life and I don't know how to even sort through my thoughts anymore. You know moving away from everything and everyone I have ever known has been tough but it has opened my eyes more than anything I have ever experienced. God knew that I was to comfortable and living in that comfort was causing me to be a lukewarm, stagnate Christian. Not only have I learned so much about myself since I have been here, I've also learned so much about others. Finding out that friendships will change no matter how hard you try to hold on to them, and life as you may know it can change all in the blink of an eye. The biggest thing I have learned since I have been here is GOD IS THE ONLY PERSON THAT WILL NOT FAIL YOU. I have tried putting my trust in so many other things and it just isn't worth it. Every single time I have been left brokenhearted. I used to find my self worth and trust in friends. They were my everything. Don't get me wrong I love them all to death but I have realized that they too aren't always there. Even if they are they are going to break your heart and maybe even walk away but God won't. If I wouldn't have had my faith to lean on during these last 4 and a half months I wouldn't have made it. Day by day my God is making me stronger and breathing peace and strength into my heart. He will be my portion forever. I want to end this by putting this little poem I ran across during my quiet time today, but venting all of this has calmed me down and made me feel so much better.
My peace I give in times of deepest grief,
Imparting calm and trust and My relief.
My peace I give when prayer seems lost, unheard;
Know that My promises are ever in My Word.
My peace I give when you are left along--
The nightingale at night has sweetest tone.
My peace I give you in times of utter loss,
They way of glory leads right to the cross.
My peace I give when enemies will blame,
Your fellowship is sweet through cruel shame.
My peace I give in agony and sweat;
For my own brow with bloody drops was wet.
My peace I give when nearest friend betrays;
Peace that is merged in love, and for them prays.
My peace I give when there's but death for thee--
They gateway is the cross to get to me.
"My peace I give you." John 14:27
Brittnay, It thrills my heart and soul to read the above blog. You have encouraged me, a 40 year old, to hang on to God when all else fails. Thanks for being a wonderful inspiration and I will add you to my prayer list. Dorinda Wagler (one of your Odon friends)
ReplyDeleteaww thank you Dorinda!! That means so much to me! Thank you for praying for me, that is so sweet. I will add your family to my prayer list also! Hope all is going well for you guys! =]
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